- Minimalistic (don’t use much material)
- Biodegradable (well, it’s just a thin piece of paper, and tea leaves are compostable)
- Without extra packaging like staples, strings, or tags
It’s a very clever design and I really appreciate the effort they put into making eco-friendly tea so accessible.
So anyway. I steeped this tea for four minutes. I enjoyed the steeping process as well as the tasting process, because this tea gives off a wonderful aroma as it brews. It’s actually so good that you might end up worrying that the tea won’t live up to its fragrance when you actually taste it. It smells like an excellent dessert, which of course it should since it’s dessert-flavored, and creates the impression that you’re baking something custardy in your kitchen.
After steeping, it’s become a nice medium-dark color; it’s reddish/orange/brown, and the smell has strong notes of vanilla and cream. The first sip definitely has more black tea flavor than you’d expect from the fragrance. There’s lots of pudding flavor too, especially in the aftertaste. A bit sweet on its own (without sugar), and it’s very, very buttery.
With milk, it tastes like a custardy dessert in liquid form– it doesn’t taste eggy, though (which is probably a good thing, because who would want to drink eggy tea? Although eggnog chai is definitely a thing I drink sometimes, but it tastes more of spices than of egg fortunately).
Four minutes is just the right steeping time. If you wanted it more dessert-like, you could add sugar to boost the sweetness. But I’m having it for breakfast, not dessert, so I’m not doing that because it seems plenty sweet enough the way it is. Milk goes very well with this (and adds a slightly sweet dimension while also boosting the creaminess). Especially whole milk. I don’t vouch for creamless milk though. Anyway, the creaminess plays into the pudding illusion, so that’s another positive.
Here’s the scoop!
Leaf Type: Black
Where to Buy: Republic of Tea
This decadent dessert tea has the homemade flavors of vanilla sponge cake drizzled with rich caramel sauce. The full-bodied base of premium black tea lends itself well to a splash of milk, making it a perfect afternoon tea to partner with puddings, scones and shortbread.
Learn even more about this tea and tea company here!
The tea’s name, “The Cake Is A Lie,” is a “Portal” reference. It’s a PlayStation game in which you use your wits to survive through a corrupt company’s testing facility. You’re told at the beginning that cake will be served at the end of your testing, but spray painted messages begin to pop up saying “the cake is a lie.” And it is. The company expects you to die, so why would it prepare a cake?
So it’s kind of fitting that I don’t think this tea quite tastes like cake. (A LIE. Though I think they meant it to taste like cake.)
I think it tastes like that delicious crunchy sugar-cream glaze one finds on cinnamon buns, danish, or glazed donuts. Which is ALSO delicious.
I don’t know if I oversteeped, but I also detected a sort of coffee tang here. Coffee is not one of the ingredients. It might be a note in the underlying black tea. Or it might just be in my head.
Because when I think donuts, I think donut shops. I think about how, when we were in elementary school, when it was your birthday, your mom typically purchased enough donuts or cupcakes for the whole class. They got distributed at lunch.
I’d always follow Mom into the coffee shop to procure those donuts. And it always reeked of coffee and cigarettes.
Yes, it used to be legal to smoke inside eating establishments. And some places were way worse than others.
Bars and donut shops were the absolute worst. Bars because the smell would mix with skunked beer. Donut shops because the old guys who sat around drinking coffee at the counter would smoke really low-end cigarettes which have a distinct smell.
Smelling vaguely like coffee and cheap cigarettes all day didn’t deter me from birthday joy, though. I’d have that donut with lunch, and cake with dinner.
So really, I guess the donuts and the cake aren’t that different. Was the cake a lie, after all?
Here’s the scoop!
Leaf Type: Black
Where to Buy: Geeky Teas
Black tea, natural vanilla flavour, candy sprinkles, natural creme flavour and natural caramel flavour.