Inconceivable! Vizzini’s Brew from Geeky Teas . . . . . . .

I love a tea with a good theme, so Vizzini’s Brew from Geeky Teas was a joy to drink and write about.  Vizzini refers to the character from the Princess Bride film, you know the one who was always shouting: inconceivable!  His brew was made with a black tea from the Fujian province of China.

When brewed, this blend was exceptionally smooth, both smelling and tasting reminiscent of creamy hot cocoa.  With a chocolate scent and silky mouthfeel, this brew was far sweeter and more comforting than the grating voice of its namesake.

Beneath the sweet buttery-vanilla cocoa flavors, there were hints of honey-roasted nuts, reminding me of honeybush teas.  The range and potency of these delicious flavors were impressive, knowing that this was an unflavored black tea.

I think the real cleverness in choosing this blend for Vizzini lies in its brewing notes.  Geeky Teas said that this type of tea can be brewed strong or light according to your preference, and it will maintain its tasty cocoa notes without getting bitter.  I couldn’t help but imagine brewing two mugs side-by-side with different brew times and tasting them to compare.

It made me think of Vizzini’s infamous “pick your poison” scene in the Princess Bride.  A clever man would brew a strong tea… Light or strong: which would you choose? Just remember: never go against a Sicilian when death– I mean.. a good cup of tea– is on the line!


Here’s the scoop!

Leaf Type: Black
Where to Buy: Geeky Teas

Black tea from the Fuijian province of China. Can be brewed strong or weak. As you wish.

Learn even more about this tea and tea company here!

Merricat from Malfoy Tea Emporium. . .

I found this tea via a Shirley Jackson gift list on Book Riot. Ms Jackson was an early female horror writer whose work still holds up REALLY WELL today. If you want to be pleasantly surprised by some creepy older stories, give Shirley Jackson a try.

Anyway, this tea is based on a Jackson book I’d just read (We Have Always Lived In The Castle), so of COURSE I had to buy it, and maybe, like, some others fell in the cart, too. The Malfoy Tea Emporium focuses on literary references and guys, I’m mostly made of stuffed animal components, not willpower.

This tea is a mix of “black tea, raspberry leaves, natural creme flavor, natural blackberry flavor, natural cranberry flavor, and cranberries.” It is, true to its name, a creamy berry delight. The primary thing is the cranberry flavor, with the cream and raspberry skipping along behind it. These are fresh out the garden. A Victorian after-dinner treat.

This blend tastes like the berries in the novel that were covered in sugar and arsenic — except I don’t see poison in the ingredients, so I think I’m good here. If you don’t see any more posts from me, call the cops and tell them how I died.

Here’s the scoop!

Leaf Type:  Black
Where to Buy: Malfoy Tea Emporium

Inspired by Merricat Blackwood from Shirley Jackson’s story “We Have Always Lived In The Castle”, this tea is blended with black tea, raspberry leaves, natural creme flavor, natural blackberry flavor, natural cranberry flavor, and cranberries.

Learn even more about this tea and tea company here!

Jane Eyre from First Edition Tea Co. . . . . .

Something about the fall/winter months that makes me want to read Jane Eyre. I want deep, spooky, atmospheric, dramatic love stories, sweeping drama, chilly breezes and of course– good tea.

Of course, this likely has something to do with the fact that I first read Jane Eyre in an October, a few years ago– and everything makes me crave tea, frankly. So you can imagine my delight when this lovely little Jane-themed sample popped up in my sample stash while the air was still crisp and cool outside.

Jane Eyre is a black tea filled with autumnal like delights– currants, cranberries, cinnamon, fennel, licorice– all things reminiscent of a dark and spooky night. Brewed, it’s hearty and dark, but not pitch black– a fall tea that’s still light enough that it could be as appropriate when sipped at an apple orchard as it is with a book in your hand, next to the fire. The spice is the most prominent flavor here for me, though the cranberry/currant notes find themselves onto my palette as well, making this tea almost-reminiscent of a liquid fruit cake. I just have an inkling that Jane would’ve been a fan of this brew, friends.

Reader, I drank it. (and it was gooooood.)

Here’s the scoop!

Leaf Type:  Black
Where to Buy:  First Edition Tea

Shop is currently taking a break but should be returning soon.

Learn even more about this tea and tea company here!

Queen of the Underworld from Malfoy Tea Emporium. . .

I bought a huge lot of samples on Etsy a few months ago, and then tripped and fell down a rabbit hole of Endless Workweeks and forgot to post about tea for like two months. True story. Now I have clawed my way out of this hole, gasping, covered in mud, and disoriented, and this tea is no longer for sale, but whatever, I’m reviewing it to the best of my ability, even though I can’t look up what’s in it or any of its specs any more.

This tea from Malfoy Tea Emporium’s Goddess Collection was a black tea with cinnamon and pomegranate/berries in it. I’ve had about 4 cups now and this is the final bit of my sample. Let me tell you, I’ve been loving the HECK out of it in my frenzied interim. It’s just the right balance of sweet and tart. It’s sassy. It’s pretty. It tastes like someone snapping their manicured fingers at you to row the canoe across the River Styx a LITTLE faster, please.

It instantly brews up a dark amber that’s very alluring. If this is meant to emulate Aaliyah’s final role as Queen of the Damned, and this is sort of a blood thing, it nailed it. If that wasn’t the intent (I can’t seem to read the Etsy listing any more), well, uh, you failed at getting something else right.

I’m not sure if this is going to come back, but if it does, you should get on board. It’s the catty sorta-chai you’ve been waiting for.

Here’s the scoop!

Leaf Type:  Black
Where to Buy:  Malfoy Tea Emporium

This tea is currently not available but click below for teas that are.

Learn even more about this tea and tea company here!

RYCBAR by Fandom Teas. . . .

I’m a Doctor Who fan and, even with the information that this is an “impossible girl” inspired tea, it still took me several seconds to figure out what the name of this blend meant. Maybe my brain was just really slow today? Hopefully you can figure it out faster. 😉

I steeped two teaspoons of this tea in ten ounces of 175-degree water for three minutes.

While steeping, it starts smelling fruity right away. This is a flavored tea (raspberry-pomegranate flavored) and the tea liquid is much darker than an unflavored green tea would. That might be from the raspberry, although it’s not really pink; it’s a sort of clear and handsome brown color with a reddish tinge.

First sip: It’s definitely fruity and sweet. Pomegranate and raspberry are both quite tart fruits, but the tartness isn’t coming through too strongly here, although yes, there is quite a bit of astringency. The fruity flavors complement each other well, and the green tea base sings backup; I’m hard put to it to distinguish its flavor components separately, yet I can still tell it’s there.

With sugar: Sweeter, of course. But surprisingly, I can taste the green tea base a bit more now. The sugar tames the astringency but doesn’t really bring out the fruity flavors like I hoped/assumed it would.

I bet this one would be great as iced tea too, but wouldn’t want to try milk with it because it might be too acidic for that.

All in all a fun tea, and one that I’d like to try iced (or as cold-brew) if I ever have the chance to try it again!

Here’s the scoop!

Leaf Type: Green Tea
Where to Buy: Fandom Teas

This tea is no longer available but click below for Doctor Who teas that are.

Learn even more about this tea and tea company here!