I’m a little groggy from a night of nightmares in which my husband WOULDN’T STOP TALKING DURING TV. Not just any program: a reboot of my favorite childhood TV show (Space Cases). I kept whining “YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEEEEEEEEEEEEANS TO ME. STAAAAHHHHP.”
I need to stop drinking.
So here I sit, hoping that this assam tea will wake me up.
The bag says it’s “strong and malty black tea,” but what I’m mostly picking up here is an English Breakfast kind of flavor. It’s a little bit astringent and raisin-y. It’s pretty good tea, in an English Breakfast tea. As an Assam, it’s not fillin’ the bill.
Am I being pranked?
I feel like Ashton Kutcher is going to pop up and say “YOU’VE BEEN PUNKED! THIS IS ACTUALLY ENGLISH BREAKFAST THAT WE PUT IN AN ASSAM BAG! PUUUUUUUUUUUNKED!”
Oh, Ashton. You SCAMP.
I was thinking about Ashton Kutcher/Steve Jobs this morning, actually. (I can’t quite remember what Steve Jobs looked like, so Ashton tends to fill it in.)
Bagged tea is the iPhone.
Follow me on this.
Did you know that there was a time when I had a flip cell phone AND an iPod? I had to carry them both around in college. It was a hellish and inconvenient time.
Bagged tea is the one-step solution to tea. It’s CONVENIENT. Like checking movie times literally anywhere. Or listening to music and having it gracefully fade down when someone calls. Or looking in the face of someone on the other end of the country.
Loose leaf tends to have flavor on its side, but there are times when I can’t bear to portion it out, fill the steeper, wait, push the button, clean the steeper, etc.
If getting tea-punk’d every once in a while is the price I have to pay for ease on mornings like today, I’ll pay it. Just like my outrageous phone bill.